Helpless
Posted by: beetlejuice357 on: April 2, 2009
If there’s one thing (among many things) I hate, it is the feeling of helplessness. I care less for issues pertaining to myself. I know for sure that I have limited control on my life and when things don’t go my way, I don’t really fret it out (allll that much). I just crib.
But I hate feeling helpless when it comes to not being to help someone.
A couple of weeks ago, a friend of Pp’s met with an accident while riding back from college on his bike. After an agonizing week of waiting, he finally decided it was way cooler up there. I felt so pathetically unable to do anything, or say anything or even think anything (yea, that’s a first!). I wished a million times over that there could be something I could do. Another doctor? Some other treatment? Prayer? I mean what? And I didn’t even know the guy. I felt the pain Pp felt at having lost one of his really close friends. I was seeing things through his eyes and I was just so….at odds…not being able to do anything to change the situation or alleviate his pain.
And then yesterday. My grandad’s sister had a heart attack. I must mention I have this ultra-soft corner for those 80 plus-ers. I find them adoringly cute and I could spend hours talking to one. I was a little taken aback at the slightly callous, if I may call it that, attitude of those around. Other relatives I mean. “She’s past her age, she’s in a lot of pain, she’s a heart patient with 3 blocks now and she’s 83 – any point in doing a bypass? All that money, who has it? Everyone has their own tension” Etc etc. That poor little thing was more worried about her children having to spend money and time on her than think about her own pain!
I’m not taking anything away from all those who were around her. They obviously care for her more than anything but yet the other concerns were lingering in the air like unwanted guests. I was pissed as hell. I wished then that I had just studied a little harder and become a doctor. I regretted every one of those dresses I just bought, wishing I’d just saved atleast some money that could be of help. I know she has her own people to help. I’m sure they know what’s best for her. I know they would take care of her better than I could.
I tried to pray – which is what everyone said is the least I could do – but I just couldn’t shake off that feeling. At the end of it, I just shrugged and let it be.
It sucks to feel helpless.
13 Responses to "Helpless"
April 2, 2009 at 10:42 am
TRUE!!I can so understand how distraught you are rite now..Keep up ur faith in the almighty and am sure,nothing heals things better than time.and am sure,it will,in your case too.. 
Take care sissy..
Nikhil
Preeti:Yea, keepin my faith up…hw u doin????
April 2, 2009 at 3:03 pm
a lot of things are beyond our control, it’s hard but we can only spend a moment and then move on with life….
Preeti: Yup, true….
April 2, 2009 at 6:30 pm
I can understand everything u r talkin about… for me people above 60 are like children who needs all ur attention and care…
Preeti: Yea! I love them…totally special
April 2, 2009 at 6:49 pm
The thought that you care goes a long way. You don’t need to feel helpless!
Preeti: That’s all i can do
April 2, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Hey! Don’t worry too much. I know how it feels to be so helpless. Sucks! But keep that hope alive and everything will be A-Ok in no time
Preeti: Yea Right now it is
April 3, 2009 at 5:52 am
Things happen to all of us that are outside our ability to control. Hope and prayer are the two things that can help overcome situations like that.
Preeti: Hope n prayer it is
April 3, 2009 at 7:19 am
Huh! This is a pretty awkward time to start reading your blog again. Chin up! Life cannot be that bad. You have a tatoo.
Preeti: Hehe…ada unum vidalaya nee?
April 5, 2009 at 6:36 pm
I’m like you. But have learnt over the years that there are things that are beyond our control. I say the same things the boys said. Chin up, do your best and take things as a lesson for the future!
Preeti: yea
April 6, 2009 at 8:11 pm
Feeling helpless sucks, so don’t feel that way! Do whatever you can to spread cheer, and that’s it. You’ve done your bit then.
Am SOOOO sorry I completely dropped off the face of the earth. Will definitely email you soon! Promise!
Preeti: Where r u! :p
April 8, 2009 at 6:18 am
man…..i sooo get it…..thr r a quite a few incidents i can relate to like wat u said….but like wat the others have commented, there r thingz beyond our control….really….and regarding grand parentz….i think they r by far THE BEST in the world…..no one meanz so much to me ….the best v cud do is take care of them as much as v can and spend as much time wit them as possible….bout ur grand dads sis…..im sure shel get back 2 bein normal soon…one thing v can all do is pray for any1 and b positive….
Preeti: positive 
April 13, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Hey Preetz…..long long time!…well, i dont know how…but i somehow got across to this blog of urs!..
Anyways..regarding being helpless…i agree esp because I have faced this incident, and that too with a total stranger….
Me and some of the guys were hanging out as usual at our fav hang out spot….when this 13-14 yr old kid got hit by a car and the driver didnt have the balls to wait there and take him to a hospital….and if thats not all, we found out that the kid was mentally handicapped….
We were pretty distraught on seeing the kid’s plight…and decided to take him to a hospital then and there…(it was like 11pm)..when we got to the hospital…none of the staff were willing to handle the kid bcos he was mentally ill and was shouting (bcos he was in a lot of pain)..we were trying hard to distract him…but to avail….then the doctor arrives at like 1am…and he says that we need a police complaint before any treatment is done..so there we went …got a police complaint..(which wasnt easy…the police took about an hour or so in questioning..)….and we got the complaint permit…gave it to the doctor…and he says “this guy is mentally ill..we cant treat him here”……i seriously dont remember the number of swears I threw out at the doc (in my mind of course…since we needed to get the job done)….finally…a friend of mine was able to get to a doc he knew…and he was willing to do something…which was sometime around 5am…
the kid got fine…he was taken care of..treated and admitted into a mental care unit…but only after they had to amputate his right leg…which could have been saved had the first doctor taken timely action…(the gangrene on the injury made it imposs to save after 3 hours into the incident…where were we then? trying to get a police complaint letter for the doc!)
In the end, i felt the same: HELPLESS!
Preeti: JAG! long time…u remembr me! 
not bad not bad…n ur incident…man, dont think i wouldve gotten over that for a long,long time :-/
May 29, 2009 at 10:19 am
Helpless.. a state I loathe. Sometimes things can be so bad that though yo want to help you cant!
Have been thru so many times. And currently going thru the same state w.r.t my career..
Its worse to see your old people leaving us. It can change a lot of things.. Inside and outside. The trick to accept is to try and become like the lotus.
Take Care
April 2, 2009 at 10:22 am
True. when we want to do something very badly and when we realize that we are helpless, it frustrates a lot… but as the saying goes, there is no lock without a key
Preeti: Smhow i seem to have alll the wrong keys
hehe…